Putting God First

"When God comes first in our lives whatever comes second will always be right. . . Hugh Nibley observed that if you're not sure what you should be doing, read particularly the Book of Mormon. It is eithe the best thing you could be doing at the time or it will quickly put you on to what you should be doing." --Camille Fronk Olson

Should I go the Extra Mile?

Several years ago, after the birth of my first child, I learned that motherhood is easier when I keep things simple. Sometimes, though, it's fun to "go all out" for a birthday party or other special occasion. I've realized that it is hard to discern when to keep things simple and when to exert a lot of energy on a specific task. For example, I remember a time when we were having guests over on a Sunday night, and I spent the entire aftenoon cooking, because I thought all the food should be homemade. I ignored my entire family on our one family day of the week, so that I could do something that I thought was important. At the end of the day, nobody really cared if all the food was from scratch. So I found some guidelines to help me, as I'm still really guilty of doing this.

Emily Watts, Being the Mom
1. Will it feed me in some way--creatively or emotionally or physically or socially?
2. Is it important to another person's well-being?
3. Can I honestly say that I have the time and money to pursue it?

Our Bodies are Temples

"When appetites control us, when we neglect to keep our bodies and minds in the best possible condition, we may not be literally breaking the Word of Wisdom, but we are neglecting a sacred trust that the Lord has given to us when he gave us our marvelous bodies." --Lindsay R. Curtis

I was raised with the knowledge of the Word of Wisdom. As a young adult, I was never met with a real temptation to break the Word of Wisdom. I consider this a huge blessing for my spiritual and physical health. I have, however, been tempted to disrespect and mistreat my body in other ways (and this does not include tattoos and piercings). Yes, many women struggle with body image, and I am not exempt, but this issue goes beyond body image. Ultimately, how we eat can take a huge toll on our behavior. When I don't eat right, when I am not getting enough exercise, and if I am not getting enough sleep, I am REALLY cranky. My poor kids have to put up with my bad moods. I don't think this is fair. Sometimes though, with little kids, the only thing that I have control over is how I eat. Eating poorly can be a huge temptation. When I am stressed, lazy, or tired, it is really easy to ignore what my body really needs. And I've learned that motherhood can induce feelings of stress, laziness and fatigue like nothing else! So for me, a huge part of the Word of Wisdom is just eating right. I realize, though, that my definition of not eating right may be a little different than another person's definition. My friend gets migraines from eating chocolate. So if she eats chocolate, she feels like she is breaking the Word of Wisdom, as she cannot physically function with a migraine. I have learned that when I drink caffeine (Dr. Pepper), I just CANNOT fall asleep at night. That is NOT a problem I can live with right now. When I don't sleep, I can't really function either, so I guess I could hold myself to a standard of not drinking any Dr. Pepper, and if I did, I would be breaking my own personal Word of Wisdom.

I really appreciated Elder Ballard's comment at General Conference April 2008. He told young mothers to "avoid substance abuse of any kind." I've had to ask myself what substance I could be abusing physically to make myself feel better when I am tired or upset. I guess "junk food" that is used to help lift my mood, or that is used as something to eat when I am bored could be considered a substance that I am abusing.

This is not something I expect myself to become perfect at overnight or even over the next year. I like junk food just as much as the next person. I think the real issue, though, is understanding the sacredness of our bodies, and after we understand how miraculous are bodies are, we begin to understand we may not be able to do all that the Lord needs us to do if we aren't taking care of our bodies the way we know we should.

Taking Offense

Sorry for the long draught. My excuse is that I was out of town. For the few who read this, I hope you haven't given it up yet.

I realize that a lot of the quotes I talk about are issues that I struggle with personally. Maybe it is because I am painfully aware of my weaknesses that it helps me to talk about them. So, if you know me well, it will be no surprise to you that I am writing about this.

"Life is too short to get offended." I don't know who first said this, but it is true. I waste so much time stewing over things that are unimportant--people that don't even realize they have offended me--things that should not even offend me--if I really knew the whole story I would know that it is silly to take offense--time and energy that would have been better spent doing something else. Lately, I have been impressed by a few people that could have taken offense at something but chose not to. I think it is a very Christlike thing to do to give somebody the benefit of the doubt when they have done something that could be seen as offensive. I hope to be able to do this someday. It's an easy temptation to fall for (taking offense).

Cleanliness

People who know me well--or even just a little--know that I'm a little bit OCD when it comes to having a clean house. Yes, I'm a neat freak. There are some good things and some bad things that come with this characteristic. The bad things are obvious to my husband and kids. I'm a huge nagger about cleaning up, and I exhaust myself with so much. . . cleaning up. I get upset about the little messes my kids make, which is pretty silly. And our living room couches--I have to smooth out the wrinkles after they have been sat on. Now that is ridiculous. But I suppose there are some good things that come with this characteristic. Since I can't go to bed with dirty dishes in the sink or toys on the floor, we always wake up to a clean house. Once a week I sanitize the house top to bottom, so we usually don't live in dirt. And I LOVE to organize, so it's not too hard to find things, as everything has a place. I truly believe that I was born this way. My mom could testify. I have a hard time feeling peaceful, happy, or relaxed when I'm living in a mess. In Discourse of Brigham Young I love some of the things he says on keeping a clean house. It helps me feel a little bit better about my "disorder."

"I am addressing myself to the ladies of the Kingdom of God, to those who know how to keep their houses, furniture and beds pure and clean, who can cook food for their husbands and children in a way that it will be clean, tasteful and wholesome. The woman that can do this I call a lady. In this view I differ from the world generally."

"A good housewife, whether she possesses much or little, will have a place for everything she has in the house, and make her house orderly and comfortable, and everything when wanted can be found in its place."

Angels

One of the talks that I heard today during General Conference was on angels, "seen and unseen," by Jeffrey R. Holland. I loved this talk for many reasons. I have never heard anyone speak on this topic, and I gained a fresh perspective on people and on heaven. There have been times recently when I have really wanted to feel comforted and protected. I've been able to feel that comfort and protection through exercising my faith and through letting go of my fears. It's taken a while, but I've been able to feel at peace for the most part. It's possible that I've been watched over by angels. Maybe all of us are most of the time. This talk also helped me realize that many people who I see and talk to on a daily basis are also angels. There are people who are "angelic" in their kindness and selflessness, because they are on the Lord's errand. These people are often answers to many prayers. I think of my visiting teacher, who is so Christlike and who has talked me through a lot of my worries and struggles. I think of my mother and mother-in-law, who have selflessly and righteously served their families for so many years, never expecting or getting much in return. Now that I'm a mom, I'm starting to see just a little bit of what they went through, and I realize how often they had and still have to draw upon the powers of heavn. I think of a roommate--four years of college--who was definitley heaven sent. She helped me decide what kind of person I wanted to be, and she taught me to enjoy life, even when life was hard. I think of having children and how innocent and angelic they are. I think of righteous priesthood holders in my life, most especially my husband, my father, and father-in-law, who bring happiness to so many people by exercising the God-given power of the priesthood. I'm grateful that we're not so far from heaven, that these experiences can be real.

Time

"Dost thou love life?
Then do not squander time,
For that is the stuff life is made of."
-Benjamin Franklin

Ways You Can Save Time
by Alan Lakein, an Authority on Time Management

Try to find a new technique every day that will help you gain time.

Plan your schedule the first thing in the morning, and set priorities for the day. Make a list and tick off the important items first.

Have a light lunch so you don't get sleepy in the afternoon.

Consult your list of lifetime goals once a month, and revise them if necessary. Identify activities that you can do each day that will further your goals.

Carry blank index cards to jot down notes and ideas.

Delegate everything you possibly can to others. Use specialists to help with special problems.

Try not to work on weekends!

Give yourself time off as a special reward when you've accomplished important tasks.

Start with the most profitable parts of big projects.

Focus on projects that you are convinced will provide you with the greatest long-term benefits.

Examine old habits for possible streamlining.

Put "waiting time" to good use; relax, read, or do something else you wouldn't otherwise have done.

Don't waste time regretting failures, or feeling guilty about what you don't get done.

Remind yourself: "There is always enough time for the important things."